So I'm driving into the sun as it's kneeling into the horizon, music going. And all of the sudden I had a feeling that became over whelming. I finally figured out the secrets of flight from instructions on record. This is the time I will most cherrish when I am older I and aswell as regret (haha). I'm finally taking direction, no long just wandering around. No, I know have clarity about who I am, what I want, and I have a good idea where I want to end up. You always have to leave options open, only because no one is a soothsayer, no one can predict what will happen tomorrow.
I feel at peace now, life is slowly starting to unfold for me. Only because I took the first step and started to peel off the layers. Now it's just starting to happen. The benefit is coming together, but for the second I am putting it on the back burner only because that's the near future, and to ensure its place and its success, I must take care of certain other projects right now. I am now fully ready to make the frames for the paper I made that has poetry written on it, in calligraphery. Also the cd is complete, a few tracks have to be remastered, and Grover has to lay down his part, but besides that its complete. Everything is laid out, and now I am focusing on the order of the songs, and other small details, such as the transitions from songs to poems.
And when I heard the record at my producers house, Andrew Gustin. I was amazed, seriously. It sounded so perfect. Regardless if people like it or not is up to them. But I am very proud of all 30 tracks on it. And with out a doubt I can say with confidence that no one around here locally is or has made something like this. Its original, creative, special to me. And honestly the whole process was beautiful to me. Making music with others who just know how a piece is suppose to go regardless if its poetry or music is brilliance, especially when everyone in the room feels like that is where they belong at the moment, and not just myself. Im talking about all the artist involved. I'm so greatful, and to an extent I see more possibilities for myself. I feel it in my bones. I know have the instructions of flight down. Now its going to be time soon, that I fly.
I am seeing poetry in so many ways. I understand words and emotion better and clearer than ever before.I feel this change that is happening to me. Hell I see it in our community here Indy even. More poetry spots are still popping up. Erin Livingston, Adam"henzbo" and St. Peace are starting up a new reading aswell on Monday's at locals only soon. Having both in and out of state features weekly. With serious slams and with fun no nonsense slams. Mid-Town which is hosted by Allen Imagery is still thriving aswell. From up here where I live way up north past carmel to southern Indiana with what the Dog Woods are doing in Columbus and Bloomington back to downtown. Poetry is fluiding the streets and air waves. Its about to blow up, and if I have my way. I will be part of the reason it does. I seriously love poetry and writing. Nothing else not even sex feels as good to me compared to when I finish a new song or a new piece. And I know that may sound crazy but its true. Tis a awesome thing when one knows what they are meant to do and start doing it. Very few things can be more powerful. And its also very influential. Just like a Coltrane musicial. It makes me want to continue and see the completion of my projects, and want continue supporting the scene of art at hand. I feel more focused than ever, does that make me dangerous. I dont know, but I have the ability to do everything I need and want to do.
Take for example the weekly open mic I am hosting called the Word Gallery, that is also taking off. I have features booked all the way to the 9th of july, and am in heavy promotions for it aswell. The reading is becoming alive in so many ways. And honestly I feel people come out because they feel good about it. Its not the wine, or the food, yes that is a good gimmick and is a nice treat that most dont offer. But I sincerely think it's because they feel good about just being here. They feel appreciate, and safe to share their work. And that shows me I may just doing my job right.
See to me that is the main goal for a host. See the host is the least important person there. We have to be there regardless if one person or 80 people show up. We have to make an enviroment that is fun, and welcoming. And if people keep returning and new people keep showing up. Then it's clear I am on my way, in some shape or form.
And soon the reviews for Umbra's and Fort Dad will be up. I emailed my drafts to my editor and to a friend and when I get the critiques back. I will have officially become a reviewer of poetry as well. I know not all will go as plan, but this is exciting for me. I feel prevlidge to be ablt to start doing all of these projects. And yes, they will be seen through to completion. No going back, or half ass doing it.
But I also have the festival in July10th to organize as well. We have two comedians, fire dancers, the Dwellers, Kwanzaa Popps and IRB Sound world reggea band, and 25 poets to end the night. Im charging 15 bones a ticket, but people can camp out, bring food and drinks of any kind as well. And with a line up like that and with heavy promotions behind it, I know this will to be a success. And all of the funds are to go to me putting on the Delerium Projek to help raise money for the Julian Center and shelter for abused women and children.
All I want to do is be able to continue to pay my bills with my craft, be able to be productive with my craft, influence others and just have a fun simple life. And if someone tells you it's not possible, then prove them wrong. Because honestly all is possible, we make our own limitations. No one else does that for you but you. I refuse to live a life full of wishes. And yes, I do have to take the good with the bad, its not a trade off, for nothing is, but its how life goes, its the balance of it all.